I don’t deal well with either. But . . . I am trying to follow a more spiritual path that has taught me not to judge others, so I take a deep breath and remind myself that we are all connected and a part of God. I reason that the other person isn’t stupid, but ignorant . . . and ignorant can be fixed, right?
Obviously the other person has been programmed with ideas and opinions that may have closed their mind to the truth. Surely, when I lay out “the facts” and explain the circumstances, the other person will see the error of their way and change.
Unfortunately, that conversation usually doesn’t end well. Since I have “the facts” on my side, I believe, of course, that I am in right, and I now have confirmation of the other person’s stupidity!
We have all encountered this scenario and walked away shaking our head wondering how an otherwise seemingly intelligent person can hold such a ridiculous opinion.
Instinctively my first reaction is anger at the other person because they have unknowingly – or stupidly – pointed out to me my own flaws.
From the moment of our birth, our environment bombarded our unconscious mind with the love and hope as well as the beliefs, opinions, prejudices, and agendas of the people surrounding us. An infant’s mind is like a sponge and absorbs everything, and this is the foundation on which we build our beliefs about the world and ourselves.
Every one of us – including the most spiritually developed – was affected by the people and circumstances of their childhood milieu, and many will choose to go through life without ever questioning those deeply embedded convictions. Like software in a computer, those programs will determine your career path, the type of person you will marry, how much money you make, how you will age, your health, happiness, and perhaps even how you will die. It is inevitable of course you will run into individuals who believe just as strongly in their unconscious principles and who will judge you.
It can be a struggle to unearth the unconscious ideas that are contrary to our own truth. Most people will not make the effort to change even if they can identify their own limiting thinking. They feel safe and protected in their current circumstance, even if they aren’t happy. As a person who has been “clearing” unwelcomed beliefs for several years, I know how uncomfortable and scary it can be to move out of a place of security.
In order to mask unsatisfactory feelings about certain areas of our life we criticize and judge those who think, look, act and believe differently from us. If those individuals have also accomplished their desired objective, it makes our life feel even smaller. We allow the ego to dictate our reaction instead of using our heart and mind to respond.
Addendum: This article was originally written in November of 2017. Recently I picked up a new book by Gabrielle Bernstein titled Judgment Detox. Gabby writes about releasing the judgements that are holding you back and I highly recommend it! Take just a couple of minutes and watch her video.